poetry, Uncategorized

Still

I once believed

That a star can be outshined by a stone.

And so I let go

Of the brightest one I know

Whom I admired, hoped, and longed for.

 

I was told

That you are a bamboo.

The fragrance of truth never affects you.

Tall and straight;

But never can withstand the burn.

 

I was advised

That you show no endeavor,

A little attempt is all you can afford for.

A little is enough;

And too much is extravagant.

 

Never did I questioned;

Never did I doubt;

Instead I trust, hope, and hold on to;

When a plant that’s been withered

Can still be fertile when watered.

 

It was bliss in a moment

But a moment has gone past.

You who have pulled me

In my own pain and loneliness

Has also break me into pieces.

 

I was taught

That understanding means forgiveness;

And forgiveness is serenity.

Yet I was questioned

Of how far shall I plan to bear it all on my own?

 

It was foolish

That I can fight my own blood and soul

Just so I can keep the water.

I could tire myself writing letters

Of how I felt from the very moment you enter.

 

It was heartbreaking

That when I asked for a little affection;

A little piece of your time and effort;

It bleed deeply on me

Asking was too much for your ego and tea.

 

Long before

And until now I keep insisting

That you will change; you are still growing

But only faults are on the run

In the end, no apology has ever been done.

 

You always say

That it’s me who created the mess

So I should stop and made a fool of myself

I doubt it was me

For I speak the feelings that I wanted to set free.

 

I was naïve

That I disregarded my own belief and conscience

Just so I could be with you;

I simply ignored what others say

But you will never do the same.

 

So I was told

That a guy will be a man

Only if he sees your worth; seize your worth;

A man will be a real man;

If pride will no longer be of hindrance in love.

 

And so I listened

That love is not love

When we think of it as responsibility instead of commitment.

When the love becomes burden

It breaks into silence; torn into pieces.

 

I cried enough

That for once I become alive and happy

Yet I can’t fathom and continue believing;

If from the start

The weight of love will always be on me.

 

Still a stone is a stone.

Hard, dull, and daunting.

A bamboo that is strong and unyielding.

But never did have any difference

To a coward who runs in midst of trouble and disagreement.

 

 

 

 

 

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